Sexually Explicit 'Grinding' At TVUSD Dances Sparks Online Petition

According to the petition addressed to Temecula Valley Unified School District governing board members, the moves create “a predatory environment at our school dances."

An online petition is circulating that calls for no "grinding" and "twerking" at school dances in Temecula.

The petition from Nancy Arenas states: "Grind dancing or grinding, otherwise known as freaking...is a type of close partner dance where two or more dancers rub or bump their bodies against each other, especially a male dancer rubbing his frontal lower area against a female dancer's buttocks, an imitation of rear-entry or 'doggie-style' intercourse.  A more explicit form of the dance is known as daggering.

“This is happening in our schools,” the petition continues. “ … In some instances, boys are approaching girls they have never met - essentially strangers to them - from behind, pressing their genetalia against the female's backside in an attempt to dance in this fashion.”


According to the petition addressed to Temecula Valley Unified School District governing board members, the moves create “a predatory environment at our school dances." 

Arenas wants to see the district implement a zero-tolerance policy regarding such sexually suggestive dancing. 

“Zero tolerance means zero tolerance. If a student is caught dancing in a sexually explicit way, they should be asked to leave the premises and their parents called. NO WARNINGS,” she writes.

Arenas also calls on board members to update school policies to prohibit “lewd and obscene acts.”

“Let's elevate our youth through good wholesome activities that promote healthy self esteem and healthy body image,” Arenas pleads. “These dance moves belong in a strip club or bar, not a high school where underage MINORS are present.”

At press time, 271 people have signed the online petition.

Click here to read the full petition.

Lori Harlacher-Holloway September 07, 2013 at 02:11 PM
Look I see both sides of this story. The name calling and saying "my daughter is this and your daughter is that" (paraphrasing), is not how we teach our children to resolve issues. Believe me they are reading this and you are setting a different example for them that I don't think either of you intended. I see two very passionate parents with views on how these dances go and you both have merit. But because you two both do not view it the same way does not mean one has more merit than the other. You are both right, but you are both so passionate about how you feel, I think you are both missing the other persons side. I have raised two fine young adults through the Temecula Valley School system, and I am raising one more. The last one has not made it to the school dance level yet, but it is fast approaching. I have chaperoned my fair share of these dances and yes many a time I have felt the dancing was way out of control. I asked the children to stop or they would be asked to leave. Most of them would stop, only a couple times did we ask some one to leave a dance. However, never have I had a kid come up and say that someone was doing this to me and they wont stop, or that they felt violated or intimidated by someone. I personally would have zero tolerance for that as well. Not saying it hasn't happened, but they have never said it to me. Bottom line here is, "Yes, our children sometimes act differently when we as parents are not around." But that does not mean I am an unfit parent or that I do not care how my child behaves when I m not present. I am a very involved and concerned parent and I only hope that what I teach my child/children at home, they take with them when they are not with me and they act accordingly out in public. But if they do step out of line, that does not make me any less a concerned parent or a bad parent. They have free will and sometimes make bad choices. Good thing too, I know enough people in this community and have built a good enough rapport with them, that they would let me know when my children are stepping out of line (that includes the grown ones as well). Then when they get home, it is another conversation about how one acts in pubic and if it was behavior at a dance it would be about self respect. I just feel there needs to be more supervision somehow at these dances, don't know how it would happen, cause so many kids go. But I thought attacking each other and calling the parents of these kids unfit was not fair, cause I am sure they are just as concerned as the next parent and maybe they are just unaware of what is going on. But because someone does not see things the same way someone else does, does not make them bad parents. "Cant we all just get along?"
rubberband September 07, 2013 at 02:25 PM
Current favorite thing: When people say "God Bless" and what they really mean is "Die in a fire!"....(Love me some IRONY/snarky dbl speak...) It's neither Xtian or nice, however it certainly will negate everything and anything you've said prior in a TL;DR post....Here, let me sum up: Remembering being young VIVIDLY, we were slam dancing/getting our "freak"on. One or both depending on where you went to high school......So, teach your sons what sorta thing can happen if "this" grinding is the only way you approach young women you find attractive; serious style and cool points lost by looking like a derpy Guido. Forever...on Youtube...Ladies, don't invite this sorta thing by grinding sexy-like on your girlfriends...(don't anyone start up about "shaming or re-victimizing the victim"...just don't.... READ what I wrote...srsly.)...and if some a$$hat approaches you trying to grind and you do not want this, learn how to seriously break his $hit off....Go strong on your body boundaries, both young men AND women. Possible solution: announce @ dances that dancing in a overtly grindy humpy way will get you warned/booted/watched closely, have chaperoned events.... (many of my attempts to start what we called a slam dance now called a mosh pit were shut down by an aware parent/teacher EVEN at a private school...)---Lastly, fighting on the internet is usually futile and will almost break down into crazy super quick. Shrug and make a strong, relevant post and move on. Stupid/ignorant/ bored/lonely/powerless bully people will show themselves quickly enough...and if you don't react and feed it, you get to appear brilliant and they get to look 'tinfoil hat.'----Yer welcome, Temecula.
John Smith September 07, 2013 at 04:54 PM
Lori! Absolutely 100% correct. And Rubberband, yes (like the name) I agree. We don't need a PETITION or Lawsuit to do this. It should be handled as it always is handled, stop the offenders, the drunks and drug users and remove them from the dance. Teach your children how to behave and how to stand up for themselves and if you are chaperoning and see in-appropriate dancing..interject and get involved and speak up. That is all I was trying to say. Don't hurt the kids who are just having fun being teenagers. I'm pretty sure when the boys left the house for the prom in the video they all had dress shirts on that somehow disappeared....Thanks for the level headedness!! I never called her daughter a name by the way. She just got crazier and crazier and lost her mind. Just saying :)! I wouldn't pick on child. If her daughter felt violated, that is really a sad issue. I personally have never witnessed unknown boys coming up to girls and just grabbing them and grinding on them. Even in the video they were all with their dates for the night. If they are dancing that way at a dance more is going on (maybe) when they are alone...which they shouldn't be. Have a great weekend and I do mean that.
rubberband September 07, 2013 at 09:49 PM
"PAPA, Let John Smith LIVE"...^I like this poster and wish him a large bag of money and cold beverages.
Brenda September 07, 2013 at 10:34 PM
John Smith, it must be because your "handle" is male that you can say the exact same things as me in your posts, but I say them earlier in this threat(or any) and get my head knawed off by a buncha women with their too tight thong in a bunch, seriously dude. With most making up names they only use to stalk me and my comments, not to even comment on the article at issue. Even if its the death of someone, they will not give condolences, but blast ME. Perhaps it is because I am a woman, and I do give my responses from knowledge, from truth, the heart, directly, and as a article moves on about the subject I become more informed on it. Think I will change my name to a mans name!!! That is the fix. All of your comments here have been great, as well as others on here who are also in the same frame of mind as most of us logical and "tell it how it really is people". I dont pull punches and having put half a dozen kids through school of my own and helped a few others get through high school and I have known alot of if kids for a longggg time. Still even recognize many names and the kids stop by. My kids have been talking to a few ole friends past about this (we all been jawing about it since the video by Cyrus who like most young girls were looking, acting, being, allowing themselves to be touched in certain ways at very young ages) article and common denominator is the boy rubs long enough and gets the ultimate satisfaction and maybe a few times in one night at a dance. Guess we can say "dry hump" here which means this whole article is very correct, it is premeditated on the boys part and the girls part to tease the boys, and the middle is actually sex with the boys bragging later what songs and what girl did it the best. Sure this article is spot on, it is teaching boys they can do these things to girls, to use them for pleasure, as girls know (more stupidly however) that they can tease the guys. As women we know that is the way of things. But the end product is preditors that involves "dancing" to coverup the real thing going on which is SEX. Now "pantie bunchers" If I can remember back far enough to know how much pleasure young men get from rubbing against a girl, so remember that, and realize what is really going on here in the guise of "dancing". Ahh also in my days we were rocking out to rock and phricking roll and that did not warrant touching in anyway, nor did you need a partner to just get out there and dance with everyone. Also if there was a seldom slow dance, most didnt dance and if they did it was back to that 6 inches apart thing. So if you want your daughter to be used as a try hump board then let them dance like strippers with your neighbors sons and as you chaperone, cheer them on.
Brenda September 07, 2013 at 10:36 PM
Oh and btw......why isnt this post dead after 87 comments?
K4299R September 07, 2013 at 10:39 PM
Brenda, I think the reason people "attack" you is because you always come off so judgemental. And I am being very serious here, I have read comments before making any name on here.... you just always come off as judgmental. Sometimes I agree with your comments, sometimes I don't. Although, this account was not made for YOU, it has been used to tell you when I think you are wrong. Of course in these comments I actually agree with you.
Brenda September 07, 2013 at 11:10 PM
K42, Thus my reason for always being surprised when you do attack me, as we usually do agree on the same topic. I do not however get on here and insult people, or call them names because I do not agree with their thoughts on a subject either. I do not tell them they are being judgemental when 99% are because a thought or an idea on a subject will almost nearly be judgemental if it is contrary to someone elses thoughts. Right? For example, the death of Chanel article was fine for a few posts and with my daughter being upset about her murder it was difficult to post in the first place. But I was not the person who started this presumption on who killed Chanel, it was the person who ended up turning around and saying I was being unfair to Edgar, the killer. On a news article it does not say do not list an opinion on this article, it says "tell us your feelings in the comments area below" and that is exactly what I do. I read the articles, might know a few people, and alot of it I dont say on the boards and do keep to myself. But, as I said if you are making comments on an incident, whether murder, DUI's, Political either way it could sound judgemental to another person who does not feel the same as you. But it definately doesnt need to be a knock down drag out fight.
rubberband September 08, 2013 at 02:49 AM
...and not a thing was learned and nothing of value was lost.
rubberband September 08, 2013 at 01:23 PM
http://temecula.patch.com/groups/announcements/p/petition-to-tvusd-regarding-school-dance-regulations-----------------we solved this for you....Now the only dancing allowed is Square Dancing, and that way we can just make sure they stay decent and pure by callin' the dance...I volunteer for this:-----------------------------------------------------------------Swing yer partner round and high, jus' make sure ya dun' touch her thigh............ Now everyone bow and a do-si-do, now no touchin' privates or out you'll go................ Allemande Left with your wrong paw side, no dry humpin' or we'll tan yer hide........----------- Yea I like it. Let me know you you need a caller...I'm IN.
John Smith September 08, 2013 at 01:44 PM
Rubberband Man....you are funny!!!
rubberband September 08, 2013 at 02:01 PM
I just see a non issue on this one....I must be messed up . I VIVIDLY remember being a 16-17 year old dude. And I know as I grew older, things started make more sense....and I saw patterns repeat. Flapper put rouge on their knees...Used to be Elvis was horrible....The tango was shocking....Ever heard "Todays youth is going to hell in a hand basket and they don't show respect to their elders? Know who said that? For fun and information:===============http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/tomchiversscience/100172911/kids-disrespecting-their-elders-since-4000bc/--------------Mr. Smith, have a great weekend and I DO MEAN THAT.
rubberband September 09, 2013 at 04:17 PM
I now feel violated reading this thread. /Elvis has left the building....the OLD Elvis....wait NO...The Junkie Elvis...Aw heck BOTH Elvises...Elvisi? What is the plural for Elvis?
Brenda September 09, 2013 at 04:26 PM
LOL Rubber. What ever way you make Elvis plural it looks nasty for some reason. Also we have been saying "Todays young is going to hell in a hand basket and they don't show respect to their elders"!! My mom and dad said it, I have said it. LOL, because every generation is, does, in some way, and just brings more and different ways to do it.
rubberband September 09, 2013 at 06:00 PM
I cannot stand the suspense. That whole "todays youth hell hand basket" thing? That was Socrates. Yea. That long ago. It's part of their JOB to do so......“The thing to understand about rebellion is that it's supposed to happen,” says Carl Grody, LISW, MSW, a licensed independent social worker. “It's a transitional phase of development between childhood and young adulthood.” ...............Some of the behavior is normal and to be expected and looked at carefully. Is it REALLY dangerous or outrageous? Is your teen healthy and functional in other ways?
rubberband September 09, 2013 at 06:03 PM
@ Brenda......I agree about "Plural Elvises" looking somehow pervy and nasty...HOWEVER, so does my screen name....."Rubber" is just not acceptable. You will call me by my full moniker or Mr. Rubberband........................ APOLOGIZE IMMEDIATELY, BRENDA WOMAN OR FEEL MY WRATH!!!!!!!---------scared? Brenda? BRENDA? HEY..... like a chick to start a fight then walk outta the room.................
rubberband September 09, 2013 at 06:11 PM
BRENDA GIT BACK IN HERE AND FIGHT LIKE A....UM....FIGHT LIKE....HOW you fight normally with no attention called to the fact or POSSIBLE fact you may or may not be an actual woman! You hit like a........really really strong confident woman/man whatever...FIGHT ME! COME ON!----love your nails, how do you fight and keep them so NICE!?----wait. (Brenda, w/o you answering I cannot drive this thread up to 100 comments I need yer help. Come on. You know you want to....)
rubberband September 09, 2013 at 07:10 PM
rubberband September 09, 2013 at 09:02 PM
Stella? STELLLLAAAAA!!!! O.K.--------------time of death declared at 6:01 p.m..../pulls sheet over body.....
Alex Daniels September 09, 2013 at 09:49 PM
I cant wait for the next "evolutional" trend, fun loving fornication on the dance floor...so creative and brazen!!! unzip and ugga ugga!!!!...lets see who can spill the most reproductive junk onto the polished dance floor!!!!..........Hip Hip Hurray!!!Come join us, on our quest for fire!!!
Brenda September 09, 2013 at 11:11 PM
RUBBER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am busy, I will be back later though. As much as folks like to think I dont do anything but computer, oh lordie, I do wayy too much more then computer. I wish I had more time to play Wow at least. :/ BBL
Brenda September 09, 2013 at 11:12 PM
WAIT, how did you know I had long nails???????? Rubba? ****shiver**** I have a nail stalker, alas, not my first one.
rubberband September 09, 2013 at 11:49 PM
STALK STALK STALK.....It is STILL MR. Rubberband to you, Lady. I apologized for being well, how i get, AND now you must stop flirting with me or i'll call my attorney. (/writes memo to get an attorney.)
rubberband September 10, 2013 at 02:43 PM
See? No Brenda. And I even apologized.
Brenda September 11, 2013 at 04:48 AM
Oh Mr. Rubber :) You are sooo cute. Hehehehe. I keep meaning to get back and then busy. I get busy sometimes, and look what happens when I do, someone on here with some personality and tossing some funny in on top of all the bad crap. Was actually just talking about the 19 yr old young man who was killed today on his motorcycle on Margarita :/ Very sad for someone so young to die so early in life. She knew him and a few other the last 3 months or so that have died or been injured badly. Think I will keep her tied up forever now, heck all my grown kids, LOL! Anyway, I love, I will be back, because I did have some responses to a few more of the comments before this threat completely goes by the way side. **Hugs**
rubberband September 11, 2013 at 02:24 PM
rubberband September 11, 2013 at 02:29 PM
p.s.....I am not cute, nor have I ever been cute...I was a horrid baby, and "Mother" kept me covered due to my LACK of cuteness....anything that might have been a start of cute about me was long since destroyed by my caustic and apocalyptic world view and clearly misanthropic behavior. Women despise me, other men fear me, and small children cry upon sensing me. The only creatures of this earth that willingly seek me out and gather near to my dusty war torn boots are cats....Cats like me and I have many and know how to use them! HEAR MY WRATH AND BE AFRAID!!!------------ p.s. I had a lovely meal last night and the fresh green snap peas were delish....How are you, my Dear?
rubberband September 12, 2013 at 11:44 AM
Successful talk, People.....It feels settled and safe once again....thread death...........Yer welcome AGAIN, Temecula....Yer welcome.
Brenda September 15, 2013 at 04:07 PM
Brenda September 15, 2013 at 04:07 PM
THat is how you fix it Rubberband Man. Opps MR.


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